Greetings Watersfive readers, welcome to the second installment of E-Male, rants delivered straight from the mind of your average male-man (who in this case, happens to he Jamie’s husband). Thanks for all the comments last week, a great discussion ensued. Keep it coming. I have to admit, this week’s topic, “why leaving clothes around the house is a sign we love you,” started out as a joke, but your enthusiastic response compelled me to search for some “meaning in our mess.” And what did I find? Well, read on good visitor, and see how with the right perspective, the sight of our dirty clothes may just become music to your eyes.

First, if you think you’re alone in your sea of dirty man-laundry, you’re not. A recent study by Roto Rooter found that nothing peeves newlywed brides more than the sight of their spouse’s clothes strewn about the bathroom floor. (Am I the only one that thinks the transition from plumbing to social research is a bit of a reach?) Frankly, this finding surprised me, I would have thought the classic feau paux tandem of leaving the seat up, and peeing on the seat when it’s left down would have won hands down. I guess that just goes to show how much I know. (Incidentally, men surveyed indicated their biggest pet peeve was when their spouse’s hair sheds over everything, which reminded me of the time I asked Jamie to wear a hair net in the house- guess how that went over).

All this got me to thinking, if it bothers women as much as it does, why is it that we men can’t seem to find the hamper? Is this a universal problem, or one isolated to the American male? And why is it that only girls grow out of this very annoying habit? And, perhaps most importantly, what does this habit reveal about us men?

To the first question, I’m pretty sure this is NOT a problem unique to the American male. For one thing, I’m a first class offender and I’m not American. For another, I was recently in India, and can attest that on top of driving like maniacs, Indian men, like their American coutnerparts, are beset with the notion that any old chair can be converted into a coat hanger if only fixed with enough clothing for a long enough period of time. Asia, Australia, and North America, evidence on three continents; I think we can assume this is a global phenomenon. So ladies, put down the catalog, Petrov the houseboy from Russia is not the solution to your problem, cute and affordable as he may be.

If it’s not a regional issue, it must just be a man issue. What in our DNA compels us to scatter our clothes as we undress rather than folding them or simply dropping them into the hamper? And I’m talking all men here, even the rich ones. I mean, have you ever been in a men’s locker room at a golf club (you don’t have to answer that, Auts) Towels all over the floor. Seriously, a room full of well educated gentleman that just spent five hours knocking a tiny white ball into a tiny round hole 400 yards away, but can’t manage to drop their cottons into the hamper that lays ready at their side. Now, the easy out would be to say men are just messy, but the thing is, in my case, this doesn’t hold water. I’m a neat freak, almost obsessively so. I am in love with my Dyson, and clean bathrooms for fun. And yet, a quick trip the my house will reveal that I am one of the culprits. I can’t manage to put my clothes where they belong. You want to know what I wore yesterday? That outfit is strewn over my wife’s desk chair. Saturday? Check the foot of the bed, Friday? It’s on the carpet next to the hamper. Thursday? Buried under Friday. And on and on…

Alternatively, one might suggest that men are just lazy. But even this doesn’t hold: The number one place to find my clothes? The bathroom, where, you guessed it, we store our hamper. This is probably one of those it takes more muscles to frown than smile things. If anything, spreading our clothes throughout the home takes more energy than simply dropping them in the hamper, especially for guys like me whose wives are wise enough to know that we will eventually clean the mess out of necessity (which is usually only when it becomes impossible to navigate from bedroom to shower.)

We all do it, whether we’re messy or clean by nature, lazy or driven at our core, rich of poor. So to what can you attribute this universal phenomenon? What can you glean about men that you did not know before? Bottom line, I have no idea. I simply can’t find any meaning in our mess. Excepting maybe this: the only possible signal that that pile of clothes is sending you is that we’re still here, and if we’re still here, as is evidenced by those clothes, then chances are we love you. So, ask yourself this, oh great lovers of men: Could it be that, maybe, the only thing worse than a floor littered with our dirty clothes, is one that isn’t? (Don’t answer that one, Jamie)

NEXT WEEK: The answer guy. Send me your toughest questions, because I’ve got all the answers.

to get an order of 150 pics in the mail today. but it makes me wonder– i took over 500 in the last month, so why did i order so little? because ordering all 500 would just be overkill? do you ever really order all the pics you take? anyways, excited to dive into these. or just let them sit nice and stacked on my desk. 🙂

edited to add: this is 150 in about 3 weeks. very interesting to hear how many you guys get printed.

that top photo is elsie with her new little lovey friend from K. she is all over that thing. the only buddy that sleeps in her crib with her. 🙂 so cute. thanks, K.

we had a relaxing easter weekend. kira baked some cookies. love that she loves to cook and bake. she always puts on her apron from amy and gets busy. we love it when she makes us treats! 🙂 elsie was in her harajuku bunny bib- but was asleep through church and the egg hunt. we did a ‘no candy’ egg hunt… the kids had coupons in them instead– date with mom, date with dad, 1 jamba juice, 1 movie rental, etc. we did it last year and they actually wanted them again instead of candy! yay!

i would have never gotten around to doing this:

it’s for the ki memories blog. i have done 2 so far and am feeling good. 🙂 i love that they are doing this! 🙂 love me some KI! i am inspired now. i’m not one who usually uses her supplies for home decor- i can barely make a greeting card out of them. but now i want to make one for all my kids to hang next to their bed… and some for the kitchen and the bathroom and the hallway… lol. just kidding.

but it’s cute, no? 🙂

6 weeks ago we met our little elsie. 6 weeks sounds so long ago. but she still looks tiny in chris’ arms, and is still too small to wear most of her clothes. mommy, who is getting tired of putting on the same footsie outfits and gowns on her, got antsy and broke out the dresses. this is the only one that fits. it comes from my sweet friend, shelley. thanks, shell. 🙂 it is the only dress that she has that is not pink. haha. 🙂

this is what i particularly love about this dress. you can see her little limbs. i love her little wrinkly wrists and legs. how they just dangle there. it’s the little things that i especially love. 🙂

and so at 6 weeks.. she’s already quite the lovebug in the family. sleeping well– starting out in her crib, sometimes putting herself to sleep…eating once at night and then mom keeps her in bed till the morning. eating like a champ. loving to be held, but also loving some alone time. a little fussy between 10am-12noon–but i will take that instead of fussing at 2am. loving her pacifier , sometimes a little too much. starting to smile, we even heard a few laughs. SO cute. coos a bit too. lovin that. chris and i are not schedule people. we never put the other kids on schedules… we just went with the flow. but now there is pressure to put her on one… and we figure we have a few more weeks till we decide if we are going to go for it or not. anyways, that’s it.
6 weeks of lotsa love. 🙂

with all our rain during spring break, chris took tudor and the boys to the science museum where they had a superhero exhibit! yeah! cool fun for the kids (and dad). 🙂 glad they had a good time, but i was all about seeing the pics he took. 🙂 i think he got some cool ones! and they were very happy to spend some time doing boy stuff rather than the stuff i do with them when it rains… like take them to the mall 2 days in a row. lol.

last night as we were getting elsie’s bath ready, caleb said:

"it’s not fair…she has a swing, a massager (the vibrating bouncy chair) and a pool (her infant bathtub)."

elsie turned one month old over the weekend. i took over 80 pics. here are some of my faves. don’t have it in me to go through all of them because guess what? i am sick again. let’s pray that it’s just a sore throat and that it’s not the strep creeping back again. i can’t handle that twice in a month. and it’s spring break. i usually take the kids to do fun stuff all week- but it’s supposed to rain all week. what kind of california weather is that? i am so over it. the rain. the strep. UGH. good thing i have this girl to entertain me.

took these today while she was in my lap. i was pretty proud of myself– holding the camera above and actually getting her head in the shot. and then of course, she had to do her little half smile. and i sorta got that. just a suuuuper close-up shot of her. flattering? 🙂

here’s some first thing this morning. like their ‘i just woke up’ faces? the boys were commenting on how they are starting to see her hands. remember the newborn stage where they clench their fists? well they are pleased to see her stretching those fingers out now. 🙂 how cute of them to even notice.

waking up to this smiley face. how could you resist not kissing/hugging/squeezing her every minute of the day (even at 3 am)… we can’t. do not remind me that she turns one month old this week.

kira playing the flute at the middle school band concert… getting a superior/excellent mark on her report card for band… having to decide if she’s gonna keep up with it in middle school or pick up another elective… the girl wants to do so much, but there is only one elective class.

cam starting little league again…machine pitch…hitting the ball everytime…getting people out at the bases… just the little athelete… totally getting that from chris. 🙂

caleb being cute as ever…calling his baby sister ‘cute and blushy’… giving her so many kisses and singing to her… and not being irritated when she wakes him at 3 in the morning.

and a visit from my cousin who lives far away…with our 6 kids running around who let us sit and have a conversation. (i wish you lived closer)

and chris and i going out for the first time since elsie was born! 🙂 and finally feeling better from my strep episode last week…yay! celebrating my sweet, beautiful, so loving and amazing sister in law’s 30th birthday…eating yummy food…seeing an asian imposter elvis- who actually wasn’t that bad! happy birthday, jenn. we love you! 🙂

it was a good weekend.